Welcome to my life

Hey!

You!

Yes, you! Welcome to my life. But don’t get your hopes up. It’s far from extraordinary. It’s pretty ordinary, in fact. But, it’s my life, ordinary or not, and I am allowing you a small door way into it. Just think Being John Malkovich, minus the literal small door, of course.

I, Misty, am a married 30 year old mother of one from a growing city in the south. I was born and raised here, and commonly refer to it as “the black hole,” since any who are lucky enough to leave eventually find themselves back one way or another. I won’t tell you which city, though. If you’re that interested, I’ll give you some hints. If you’re not interested, no worries, but you may want to skip the next three paragraphs…

We are the horse capital of the south (but what southern city doesn’t boast this, really?) We have Steeplechase, Polo tournaments, and are one of the top retirement communities in the nation. We are home to Palace Malace, the largest intercity forest, and some of the most stuck up and self righteous horse folk there are (who ironically are mostly from up north.)

Our county sheriff was mentioned in “High Times” magazine once. But not for what you may think. He happens to have a hilarious name that made his election campaign signs some of the most sought after and stolen around. “Mike Hunt for Sheriff!” Yes, Mike Hunt. Now say it again a little faster. See why he was so popular? No? Try again… Got it? (If so, mind in the gutter much? If not, come on, live a little!) Needless to say, he now uses his full name, Michael Hunt, in all materials.

Our state governor is just like any other crooked politician, with boobs. She is from one of our poorist counties and only seems to be worried about keeping the Boeing factory from unionizing. And jacking up our gas tax $.10 a gallon.

The Augusta National is about 40 minutes west across the river. We have had a few famous people too.  William “The Fridge” Perry hails from here. Both of his houses are here (one he lost to an ex-wife and his current one.) James Brown was arrested here (probably multiple times), but probably because he lived here, or it would have been somewhere else. One tends to get arrested often when they are on large amounts of drugs and doing whatever they please. Oh, and some of  Who’s Your Caddy was filmed here. Actually, we had to keep the restaurant I was working at open way late one night because they wanted to have a private party afterhours. Saw Andy Milonakis, Tony Cox, Jeffrey Jones, Andre 3000, and some other rappers and actors.

But I digress. Back to the introduction. Like I’ve mentioned previously, I’ve been married five years to the awesome Gavin, and mother seven years to Apollo. (If you are wondering, yes, I have changed our names, but they are directly related to our real names in each’s own, personal way.) And no, your math is not off. Well, at least for this equation. Gavin and I have lived together for almost 11 years now. We had our child three years in and married five years in. Don’t judge me.

Gavin and I are both employed full time. Gavin makes handmade tile from scratch (or in his case a box of raw clay.) He does everything from extruding, to cutting, glazing, baking, and packing. He’s lucky to have found such an artistic job, and he loves it (but wishes they would hire some help; he is the only employee!). I run a non-profit 501 (c) 3 call center for community resources. It is flexible, and I work mostly on my own, but I am spread pretty thin. (My position is actually 3 different full time positions consolidated into one to save money, which is definately not reflected on my paycheck.)

We are not religious, even though we live in the freaking bible belt. And no, we are not interested in conversion, thanks. I will no doubt talk about my views on religion throughout this blogging adventure. I am not out to offend anyone, or step on any toes, but I will express my opinion and how it makes me feel at the time. You can take it or leave it, but you are not going to change my mind. And I am not trying to change yours, so put down the hate mail and back away slowly. Remember these are my opinions, which I am free to express, and which you are free not to read if they bother you.

I believe that about covers all the basic introduction topics. This is my first blog ever, and hope it was at the very least humorous or made you smile at some point. I’ve been seeking a way to get my thoughts and feelings out without burning any bridges and bruising any relationships. This just may be the ticket, so long as there is some level of anonymity in place.

Thank you for reading and I hope to write to you again soon!

-Misty

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